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I send my parent, who lives far away, all the money they need each month for subsistence and probably more, but I'm certain they are not making the best use of it and they are not able to explain what happens to the money. I've already exhausted all avenues of reason with them. They refuse, or are unable, to give me a breakdown of their expenses. I don't think the courts would grant me a power of attorney currently though. I could refuse to send them the money directly and instead pay their bills myself, but how about everyday expenditures such as groceries? I can't micromanage their money either. What options do I have left?

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    Not a lot. This really is more of a legal question and you should consult with an attorney specializing in elder law in the jurisdiction of your parent, but generally in most jurisdictions if you give a gift - you have no right to control how it is being used.
    – littleadv
    Jan 23 at 19:35
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    I’m voting to close this question because it's an off-topic legal question
    – littleadv
    Jan 23 at 19:35
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    Why do you need to know? What are you afraid they are spending it on? Perhaps your parent just wants a little control over their life. Maybe they are even saving up for a surprise for you, telling you would rather spoil that, no? Jan 23 at 20:46
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    are credit cards common (and generally accepted everywhere) where they live? Jan 23 at 21:05
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    In English "subsistence" usually means the bare minimum necessary to survive. Is this what you are sending them? Jan 24 at 0:46

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There are many simple systems where the funds are not in the hands of irresponsible people. Store to Door shopping systems with a spending limit are a great example, the bill for that then goes to your own debit system. The rest of most basic needs can usually be paid by debit or auto-pay as well. There is no reason they need cash except for personal items or recreation. Simply figure out how much "spending" money they can have aside from the necessities that you can pay with auto-deduct systems. Trust funds do this all the time. You can also set them up with a local fiduciary to manage things for a small fee. A fiduciary system usually requires that the recipient has to ask for, and justify, any money aside from the bills. And it is up to your instructions or the judgement of the trust officer to decide if they get that money. Recipients of help don't get to decide how that works or how they want to get money.

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