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I'm trying to close a US bank account and they won't take my no for an answer. I've called many times and they say something like "we're confident that you'll want to come back, and you have our word that we won't start charging fees". I keep saying that I want my account to be closed and they won't do it.
Is my only solution to deposit $9,999 several times and trigger that one money laundering law where they have to close it?
Write them a letter demanding (no whining or pleading) that they close the account, and send it via certified mail (thus demonstrating that you sent them the letter and that they received it).
Retain a copy of the signed letter and any replies they send. If at some point they start charging you service fees, sue them in small claims court, and show the judge all the correspondence.
Yes, it's a hassle, but that's life.
The Consumer Financial Protection Bureau states:
... state law generally requires banks or credit unions to close your account in a reasonable amount of time...
You can find your particular state's bank regulator (and a direct link to file a complaint) in this CFPB list. The mere threat of such a complaint may shake loose a recalcitrant bank, so consider that first as the quick option.
Depositing more money with an institution who is already not letting you close an account is not a good idea. You're then giving tens of thousands to an entity known to be untrustworthy and doing so in a way that may draw legal attention. Don't invite the man into your life.
Withdraw as much money as possible from the account. You will need to review if withdrawing below a certain balance would incur fees. You also need to ensure that there are no direct withdrawls or outstanding checks that would further reduce the account balance. Deposit this money in your new bank account or other secure place.
Once you have done that follow the other advice about contacting relevant regulatory or consumer agencies for assistance. Document everything. Be firm but never rude nor hostile.
If you already have good relations with a lawyer, that would also be a good contact. A lawyer writing and sending a stern letter isn't that expensive and can motivate recalcitrant vendors.
Escalate your conversation to the next level of support. Repeat if needed.
If you do not have a local branch available to you, and must do this over the phone, you should ask for the supervisor and then repeat your request to that person. If the supervisor balks, then request to be transferred to a superior and repeat the request. An alternative to this is to simply stay on the phone with the one who initially took the call, simply do not hang up, and repeatedly ask that the account be closed. Many call centers have quotas on number of calls and/or maximum call times and are also required to not hang up unless the caller is abusive. So just staying on the line may make it more beneficial for the employee to close your account and get you off the line as opposed to whatever incentive they may receive to retain open accounts.
A better option would to be visit a branch in person (idealy the one the account was opened at). Ask a receptionist or teller to speak with someone about closing an account. You may get the same initial statement and encouragement to not close your account. In this case you can also escalate to management, but your physical presence across the desk and a willingless to simply sit there until the account is closed should go a long way to convincing them to close your account.
In any case, do not verbally abuse or otherwise threaten anyone as you are doing this.
Get a call recorder on your phone, call your bank, tell them you're recording the conversation and ask them to repeat that "you have our word that we won't start charging fees" part. They can't charge any fees on an empty account in a way that's not immediately visible to you, and if they do it in an explicit way, you'll have sufficient proof that you were promised not to be charged.
Most banks have an account closure procedure listed in their "Terms and Conditions" (or equivalent). It's typically an address to which you have to send a formal written notice. Since you mentioned US Bank, their "Deposit Agreement" can be found here.
They have a section called "CLOSING YOUR ACCOUNT" on page 12, but it's surprisingly sparse in details. It explains potential problems with closing your account, but the only thing it says in terms of procedure is:
If you intend to close your account: If you intend to close your account with us, you should tell us; simply transferring all the money in your account and reducing your account balance to $0.00 is insufficient notice and may result in additional fees charged to your account.
Since they're not very forthright with details, you have a couple of options.
Go into a local branch and talk to a teller or a banker. When you called you likely got transferred to a "customer retention specialist". They don't generally have those in branch offices, so it's unlikely that they'll give you the runaround. Branches will almost always give you better service than the call center. As a bonus, you can withdraw any remaining funds at the same time. The last time I did this, it took all of 5 minutes for a teller to verify my ID, close the account, cash me out, and have me sign a form.
Write a letter stating that you wish to close account number XXX immediately. Include signatures from all names on the account, plus instructions on what to do with any remaining funds. Banks will have an address where such "account management" letters can be sent. US Bank doesn't seem to make their address easy to find for some reason, so you might have to call a branch office and ask for it. Don't call the 1-800 number, directly call a local branch office.
There's a section on page 11 of the the Deposit Agreement titled "DORMANT ACCOUNTS". It says that an account is considered "inactive" if it has had no activity for a year. It also says that if your account has a zero balance, they reserve the right to close it. Transferring all of your funds and then not touching the account again might result in it being closed eventually. Be careful though. If your particular account type carries fees for low balances or dormant accounts, then those fees will reset the timer every month and you'll never actually go inactive. At some point the account will be turned over to the state (see the escheat section) regardless of any fees being charged, but in some states that can require an account to be abandoned for years. I'd consider this particular option a last resort. It's unlikely you could pull it off without incurring a lot of fees.
